Best anniversary gift ever!

Ashton Kutcher decided the best way to celebrate his 6th wedding anniversary to Demi Moore was to send ehr chocolates sleep with a nightclub whore.

According to Us Magazine, Kutcher allegedly invited Sara Leal and a friend back to his $2500/night hotel suite for a hot tub party and cheated on Demi, who was at home... in the kitchen... knowing her role.

The only surprise here is that it took him 6 whole years before he decided he was sick of the menopause symptoms. Can you even imagine how much this guy must jack off? Somewhere out there, Charlie Sheen is laughing right now. And snorting coke off the hooker he's about to physically abuse... but mostly laughing.

She ate a baby?!? Oh wait, no, she's pregnant. Sorry about that.

Jessica Simpson and her father Joe are in negotiations with a number of tabloids, including People magazine, over who gets to release the announcement of her pregnancy to fiance Eric Johnson. According to TheSuperficial.com, the star is reportedly asking for a $500,000 deal to announce the pregnancy and eventually the first baby photos.

Maybe it's just me but isn't $500,000 a little much to announce what everyone already knows- you're fat? If Jess wants to be shopping around for a $500,000 deal, maybe she should pitch something like "Jessica Simpson vows not to eat for 3 hours." Well, nevermind, you don't get the money if you can't actually keep from eating so, yeah...