Thursday, August 2, 2012

I didn't think a name change could get any worse than Prince's... I was wrong.

Snoop Dogg has officially changed his name to... wait for it... Snoop Lion.
Yes, I said Snoop Lion... like rawr! I'm a lion! A man-eating king of the jungle who smokes a ton of weed and braids my mane into little piggy tails while throwing up gang signs and singing back-up for Katy Perry.
According to the NY Daily News:
"Rastafarian preists bestowed the new moniker Snoop Lion upon the music icon when he visited Jamaica in search of a 'new path'".
Snoop Lion stated that "I feel I have always been Rastafari. I just didn't have my third eye open, but it's wide open right now."

You know what else is wide open Snoop? The mouth of your dealer as he laughs hysterically at the fact that he sold you some sticky icky with some intense other shit mixed in... because being unbelievably high on a mixture of crack, heroin, meth and weed is the only explanation for this nonsense.

Snoop Lion... give me a fucking break.